Bela Putra Perdana

There is a silent burden many people carry: shame from the past. Mistakes. Poor decisions. Moments of weakness. Failures that still echo in memory. We replay them. We judge ourselves. We wonder how different life would be if we had chosen differently. But here is a truth supported both by psychology and lived human experience: Your past is a chapter — not the whole book. Shame vs. Growth Researcher Brené Brown , known for her work on vulnerability and shame, explains that shame says, “I am bad,” while guilt says, “I did something bad.” That difference is powerful. Shame attacks identity. Guilt guides correction. In her book Daring Greatly , she emphasizes that growth becomes possible when we separate our worth from our mistakes. If you believe you are your failure, you stop trying. But if you believe you simply made a mistake, you can learn. You are not your worst decision. The Past Is Data, Not Identity Psychologically, reflection is one of the strongest tools for i...

In a world that constantly invites comparison, distraction, and noise, focusing on yourself can feel almost rebellious. Social media celebrates other people’s milestones. News cycles amplify chaos. Expectations both external and internal pull us in a hundred directions. But real growth begins the moment we turn inward. Not in isolation. Not in selfishness. But in awareness. Why Focusing on Yourself Matters Psychologists often refer to the concept of locus of control  whether we believe our lives are shaped by external forces or by our own actions. According to research by psychologist Julian Rotter, individuals with an internal locus of control tend to be more proactive, resilient, and goal-oriented. When you focus on yourself: You stop competing and start improving. You shift from blaming circumstances to building capacity. You measure progress against who you were yesterday, not against someone else today. As James Clear writes in his book Atomic Habits , “You...

As Ramadan approaches, Muslims around the world prepare their hearts before they prepare their tables. In Indonesia, one meaningful tradition before entering the holy month is salam-salaman — a moment of shaking hands, asking forgiveness, and cleansing the heart from past mistakes. At Rumah Tempe Indonesia (RTI) , this tradition is not just ceremonial. It is deeply personal. The Meaning Behind Salam-Salaman Before the first day of fasting, our team gathers, from production staff to management standing in a circle, looking into one another’s eyes. One by one, we shake hands and say: "Mohon maaf lahir dan batin." (Please forgive me, physically and spiritually.) Ramadan teaches self-discipline, but it begins with humility. We believe fasting is not only about controlling hunger and thirst; it is about entering the month with a clean heart. Salam-salaman becomes our collective reset button. More Than a Ritual, It Is Culture At RTI, we work closely together every day in ...

Leadership is often seen in offices, meetings, and big decisions. But the hardest leadership role happens at home. It happens in quiet moments. In late-night thoughts. In conversations that never feel finished. In marriage, leadership is not about control. It is about patience, responsibility, and emotional strength. It is about choosing love even when you are tired. Between Softness and Firmness Love is not always gentle. Sometimes, love must be firm. Too much softness becomes weakness. Too much firmness becomes distance. A good leader learns to balance both. To embrace when needed. To correct when necessary. To speak when silence no longer helps. This balance is the true test of family leadership. The Hidden Struggle at Home Many people succeed outside. They work hard. They achieve more. They inspire others. But at home, they struggle to be understood. Small misunderstandings grow. Fatigue becomes frustration. Love becomes complicated. Still, they stay. Not because i...

 I didn’t first learn marketing from textbooks. I learned it from the field, from small failures, limited resources, and decisions made with more courage than certainty. Only later did the term Entrepreneurial Marketing begin to make sense, because it perfectly described what I had been practicing all along. As both an entrepreneur and a lecturer, I live in two worlds that are often seen as separate: practice and theory. In reality, they constantly inform and strengthen each other. Building a Business Taught Me What Marketing Really Means When I started my business journey, I didn’t have a large marketing budget or a dedicated team. What I had was a product, belief, and the determination to survive. Every marketing decision began with a simple question: what can I do today with the resources I already have? Many strategies were not born from complex market research, but from direct conversations with customers, feedback from partners, and real-time market responses. I experime...